Before that, I have been feeling really worried, having fear.. luckily the sermon at church made me felt a lot better as what the Pastor touched on was related to what I was feeling. 

That day I was supposed to be at my stay cation, but apparently because the press release was late I couldn't confirm in time and the room I wanted was booked :/ 

It turned out to be a blessing in disguise instead as I could go to church and listen that sermon and feel better afterwards. Thank you to the church for praying for us O's candidates too. 

Thankful.

It has been a long journey ever since I found my dream course after attending the AEM in September 2014, going for my DPA Interview, getting my dream course via DPA and taking Os. 

I made the decision to drop combined science which was a huge risk that none of the students took in Yuying. 

I left the school early on 29th September to self study on my own without the teacher's guidance. 

Which many disagreed. 

I still did. 

And I'm glad. 

Results day, I still had more fear than faith as moments before I got my results, I know of someone who got his DPA revoked for the same course I'm in because he failed his maths. 

And I had witness it as well. 

I was worried. Extremely worried. 

When my teacher called my name, I went forward and I sat down and said "don't tell me anything" 

I told them that I had thoughts of dropping out since I guess my maths wouldn't have made it..

But then my teacher said, "that's your friend what"

Upon receiving my results. I cried. I shouted. It was tears and screams of joy.

It wasn't  A s that made me cried, but a "D7" for maths and "B3" for english that made me cry.

I met the minimum requirements to enter Mass Communications in Ngee Ann Polytechnic! 

Having failing maths for 4 years and only passing ONCE in streamings.. not seeing F9 makes me really happy.

I went to hug Mdm Absa and Mdm De, two of the teachers who really assured me a lot when I was feeling down the most after prelims results. 

I'm glad that I shared my joy with them.

At the same time I wished that moment last but I know that there were people who felt worse than me. 

After so many days of hard work, it finally paid off and I reaped what I sowed. 

All this wouldn't be possible if I didn't had teachers to advice me and the friends who helped me. 

I would like to thank the following people in this post. 

Mrs Zainab (ex counselor of Yuying)

Mrs Zainab, thank you for all the sessions you had with me. Ever since secondary 2 after Ms Ong left, you took over my case and you never failed to be a great listener of mine (and me a great one of yours too!) and you always knew when I was sad or happy just from the way I talked. I know that with you, I will always be able to share things that happened which I am not comfortable to talk to my teachers about and that you will always be there especially during PE lessons :P One of which, I am very thankful for was when I broke down during chemistry lesson, I called you and you picked up and said I could come down even if you had someone there. You were the one who advised me to call them, who really knew how I felt and that's how I got a step closer to my dream. When nobody agreed with me in school, you were the only one who understood where I was coming from. 

Thank you, Mrs Zainab. :) I managed to hug you and share my joy with you when I got "A1" for my Chinese Os in 2015 and it's a pity that you have left Yuying already (the year I graduated sadly) but I just want you to know that you're one of the first whom I wanted to share my joy with upon receiving my results. 

Mr Alex Tan

Mr Tan, thank you for taking time to teach me the basics of mathamatics which I have failed to master since sec 3 during your breaks (which were my free periods from dropping science). You were one of the most patient math teacher and you explained everything till I understood. Although in the end I still failed my maths, it was a "good fail" as I improved a lot. 

Mr Kenneth Koh

One of the most hardworking humanities teacher I have ever met, and you remind me of Mr Lim a lot (one of my fav History teacher who left yyss in 2012 :( ) you encouraged the class a lot, and actually gave us handwritten cards which motivated me a lot. The notes that you compiled really helped me and I enjoyed your lessons as well. Thank you for taking the time to have consultation with me and really go through things that I'm not good with and even taking time to mark the extra practices I have done. Thanks for supporting me onto going into Mass Communications and believing in me. 

Miss Jasmine Lee

My FT for 2 years, English teacher as well. I remembered those days when I was in hospital you visited me every single time without fail with flowers or balloon. I am really thankful to have you as my FT who really spends time understanding my situation and offering me good advice towards the O Levels. Taking time to mark my extra situational writing and essays, spending 2 hours to just discuss with me on how to spend my self study period wisely. I am glad that in the end I didn't disappoint you at all with my results. Still one of the kindest teacher who promotes kindness week every year without fail, I'll remember you Miss Lee!

Mdm Absa

Queen Absa! My F&N teacher since sec 1 who really gets me interested in the subject and teaches me how to make delicious food. I'm happy that I was in your group all this while :D Thanks for everything. You knew something was wrong every time and always talked to me without fail. Like when I failed English in Prelims etc. You were one of those teachers who never stopped believing in me and knew that I could go far. Thank you for teaching me my favourite subject all this while and free breakfast of Bonjour bread :p even during Os. I will always remember you queen. :D 

Mdm De

My Higher Chinese Teacher since sec 1 whom always loved me upon knowing that I want to go CO. I knew that I disappointed you at times when I didn't attend practices and such when you wanted me to be the chair person since Sec 1 but I believed that I wasn't meant for it. You allowed me to switch sections when I didn't felt right and on many occasions, giving me leeway. Always aware of what I have contributed and all, One of the teacher who appreciated my compositions a lot as well. Being in HCL class was really fun. Always knew when I was okay and not, and offering me great advice. One of the teachers who believed in me a lot who know that I can go far, very far. Believed in my potential and offering me roles to perform. Emcee for CNY, and even the emcee for Chinese Orchestra, standing at the Singapore Conference Hall, speaking to all the judges and students. 

谢谢您 德老师。

Mrs Chew 

My science teacher and ex FT who was one of the teachers who understood why I wanted to drop my combined science. All along I'm thankful that I managed to learn physics from you and doing well in sec 3. It was a pity that I had to gave up in the end but I'm glad that you supported my decision and helped me along the way. Without your understanding and help, it may be hard to let the HOD to accept my decision.. I'm glad that I didn't fail you. Thank you Mrs Chew!

Natalie (ng) 

The savior that God sent me. I still remembered that I met you that day on the bus stop and realized that hey, Natalie is the one who can help me in maths! My senior in mass comm now, and my cell group leader I'm really thankful for you in my life. You taught me maths that I didn't understood, went through TYS questions and ENSURED that I knew how to do.. Praying for me in the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep, praying for me before my papers when I had fear. Praying for me before I receive my results. I'm so glad I'll be able to see you in the SAME BUILDING in NP now!! Thank you so much Natalie, without you I wouldn't have improved on my maths, let alone achieving a D7. 

Apart from the Thank-you s 

I have a message to all those who think that they didn't do well for Os too. 

Some of you may think that it's a shame to attend ITE or even go to RP or so, I hope that this mindset of yours will be GONE. It's a society stigma that majority has. Some people just take longer to reach their dreams, but it doesn't mean that you won't. You will, in fact become an inspiration to people as well. 

I do not want any of you to regret and to say that "I should have worked hard etc" .. DON'T. 

It's over, just move on. Focus on what's coming up. Never ever look back. Since it was a huge lesson learnt, never make the same mistakes again. Learn how to prioritize tasks. 

You may feel that it's unfair that it's happening on you but then, no one's life is smooth sailing. There's obstacles, failures. But that makes you grow. Learn. That you'll become better each time you fail. 

I urge you to start afresh in a new school. Believe in yourself that you will reach your desire course. 

Don't let that results define who you are, instead use it as a push to push you to your limits. That your GPA will be perfect and you'll go to the Poly course you want to. 

The school you attend doesn't determine who you are nor what your future is as long as you're the one taking control of your life. 

I wish everyone all the best, and remember; Never Give Up. 

Thank you everyone who has been part of my journey for O level's. 

I will be finally embarking on a new journey after 4 years to where I want to be the most, Ngee Ann Poly Mass Communications. [full-width]

I am super looking forward to 2016 because it's gonna be the year of Rachel once again. 

I will talk about my wishes and plans later on, but first it's our New Year's Resolution list again! 

To see what I have achieved or so. 

In 2014, I wrote these for 2015 

• Pass maths; be more hardworking! -- results not out yet 
• DPA to Ngee Ann Poly Mass Comm! ✓ -- so thankful
• Shed more pounds! (More!) ✓ 
• Lesser shopping sprees. -- I guess no difference..
• Save money. -- not towards the end of the year
• Spend everyday wisely. ✓
• Healthier. ✓
• Happier. ✓

Not bad lah hor! 

Why am I so excited for 2016?

I guess first and foremost, it'll be a new journey in my life after so long. 

I'll be taking my O level results soon, perhaps in 11 days. I do not want to see my maths failing or English not getting B3 or so, just not that two requirements for my DPA.. 

But I guess we have to face it sometimes and seek for alternatives - in which I would definitely defer my studies for work then I'll go private. 

But then again it was all my hard work - so I'll just plan from there when it comes. 2016, I definitely imagined it to be a fantastic year if I were to be in NP Mass comm, meeting new people, doing the things I like and most importantly. studying the things I like..

I never thought I'll be able to be so close to my dream.. But at the end of the day it may not be meant for me. If I were to have a smooth path towards it, I would cherish it so much. 

2016 is also a brand new year for me as I have left the negative self - in which even years were bad and odd years were good. Ever since 2012, I guess the years just got better through the many lessons learned and 2015 was a good one. 

Also, I am looking forward to see what'll be like in my career in 2016. I can never thank Blink! Events more for believing in me since 2013. And we will be moving our office to joo seng soon! Can't wait to pack the entire office so that it'll look super clean! And perhaps having my own table although i'll just be a part time perm staff. 

Wishes for 2016 

One of my biggest wish is still to get in NP's Mass Communications. And also, I wanna be part of the scholarship program as well. :) Hope to be more efficient when working and alert as well.

To be happier and also positive. To be closer with everyone more in the industry as well. 

Blink! Events to HUAT AH! 

2016 Resolutions

And now, it's the part where I do my 2016 resolutions again!!

• Lose weight!!! (continueee)
• Use my planner daily 
• Get into scholarship program
• Pick up a foreign language proficiently
• Save money
• Keep cool at all times
• NOT Look Back

Earlier this year, I told myself that I would like the year to pass faster, and indeed it did. Slowly, I became a student who was about to graduate, and the day for prom came. Even the DPA I was looking forward so much back then in 2014 came. And soon, O Levels and all. Leaving my CCA, after 4 years... Cutting my hair for the very first time after 5 years.. 

Being 16 was fun. I thought. 

2015 was memorable in all ways, and I had some of the worse encounters ever - which may be a blessing in life. Losing some people from my life whom I thought would be the one that will always stay close to me, yet because of distance, relationships, everything was gone. 

Some people say, if you are friends with someone for more than 7 years, the friendship would last forever. 

I honestly doubt so. There are some people you may know for years, for a decade even. But the moment things go wrong, it can never go right again. 

There are some people you know for months, yet they treat you better than your friend for a decade. 

So I thought to myself, "She may be that one person who is that person I knew for years that will end up leaving for someone else she barely knew as long as I" 

Earlier this year, I witnessed a drastic change in someone whom I thought that would be my Best Friend Forever. Someone whom I merely looked through the register list on the 22nd of December 2012 and pointed that "She'll be my best friend", someone whom I pretended to not know her by bumping her on the bus and saying "are you from my class?" 

Someone I always trusted and grew close with in secondary school who is there for me at all times. Someone who brought me to many places and had many ''firsts'' with. Eating Mala Hot Pot, going to that new mall all the way in the west side. 

What happened? 

Not attending lessons, skipping exams because your abusive boyfriend stopped you from going, taking away your phone not allowing you to talk to me. And yet you're staying with him still? 

Why continue to stay when he took a knife and almost killed you. You were selfish to not think about my feelings your mom's feelings and you continued to stay. My words of advices soon turned to nothing but simply not wanting to care - when I still did. 

Why sacrifice your studies your future when he will not be someone who's relevant 10 years down the road? 

I realize I couldn't accept anymore. I couldn't stand anymore, and I finally left. 

I am not a blind supporter like your friends outside. I stand for what I believe. And that is, for a guy who does not think of his consequences who fights others because of minor reasons, who pretends to COMMIT SUICIDE so he can win someone back when he attempted to cheat - and suicide is NOT funny because there are people who really did so, and you? Pretending because you want to hold onto something that wants to leave you - in a way you threaten her with your life. 

Pathetic. 

You ignored your school friends, took their care for granted. 

When they said things about you, I still tried to explain but I realised it was all in vain. 

Perhaps you were meant to forsake this friendship for someone so unworthy to learn a lesson. 

In life there are some people who will obviously choose the road to destruction. 

"I told you a thousand times, did you listen?" 

So I learned. That you, need to be destroyed in a way to feel the heat of the fire to know that it's hot. It's overwhelming. 

As your BFF, which may be a past tense now. I really feel hurt. To see you like this. But I know, that you going through this will let you learn the biggest lesson of your life. 

"You don't have to care then" - This time, I won't. I am no longer gonna care because I realised you don't need it at all. 

This friendship wasn't a mistake, we were both blessings & lessons in each other life. 

Every cloud has a silver lining. But I'm glad after all these happened, I knew who were the people who will always be there, and understanding towards each other. 

This too shall pass. 

Let's move on to some of the great pictures taken this year. And the usual thank you-s

















































And now I would like to thank certain people who mean a lot to me in life. :) Apart from my family members.

• Victoria; Dear friend that I met through a reality competition where my sixth sense were accurate and I made the initiative to know you after watching your YouTube video.. Thank you so much for being in my life this year! It was great knowing you and I feel so grateful and lucky to have someone like you who share the same thoughts as me about the current media industry and how some people actions are. Thanks for taking time to witness my life changing moment where I cut my hair after 5 years, taking all the 500+ photographs. Also advising me on certain blog posts when I don't feel okay to publish it. All the best for everything dear! 

•  Shenelle aka Fabro; Dear Fabro thank you so much for not leaving me in lurch at any time of my life. So many months have passed and I'm glad that you're still here, our friendship still strong. Thanks for being my listening ear towards all my rants and taking all the photos and such. Encouraging me for Os as well. Going for many dinners & talking non-stop about this life. I really hope to see you in NP next year. :) Love you.

• Peiyin; Dear Peiyin, my 12 year BFF. Although distance did make us drift a little but I'm glad whenever we meet we always have something  to talk about and deep inside we know that we are indeed BFFs. We may not communicate a lot these days compared to before but I'm sure we all know what's happening. Thank you for being part of my life and still eating the dishes I cook! Hope that you'll come NP too, you may be moving but I am sure we'll still meet regularly! 

• Huilin; Dear Huilin, thank you for being my listening ear for all the bull crap incidents between me and *coughs* I know it's annoying to hear the same thing over and over again! Thanks for being there always to hear whatever I have to say and offering good opinions as well and views. I am sure you'll be in NP next year so jiayou and we can own a CCA together?! 

• Blink Events; Thank you everyone, for welcoming me into the Blink Events family as a official staff though I am not a full time yet. The endless opportunities I have and things to learn as well. Thanks for all the meals too. To my boss Richel thanks for being so nice to me and always teaching me something.. paying for my mistake. To Sheryl, Elisa and Rochelle thanks for being so helpful!! Everyone is so nice I really love all of you!